Scrub Lies. And Fired.

It was so gravity bearing to me to sit and be in a room of people that felt like slut shaming other females in front of me was attractive. The idealistic attitude I was searching for was something that was healthy and not so toxic.

Being fired for a cause is something. A reason. But the reason is just as useless as the time spent on it which got me fired in the first place. Likely related to a man from the past sticking his shit where he thinks it affects me. Or maybe the fact I was walking around the nursing home singing. Or maybe it was my PTSD dx in 2021. Misdiagnosed for years. Some of the simple things stress me out because they are so mundane it seems there is no reason to overlook the morale involved. But it could also be another coworker. Such as calling a coworker ‘super-aide’ knowing you are just trying to belittle the person working with you. And if that’s the case, that’s why I don’t ever engage. I would rather walk away.

This motivation to stay focused and be a different type of person around these types of people keeps me celibate. I would have gotten confused in any other orifice because you aren’t coming in a wholesome manner. You are trying to belittle someone else, and I am thankful that I would know before ever being intimate with you (and judging by mannerisms) you don’t have the desire to put GOD first in your life. My mind goes forward to the place where I don’t even bother formulating a reason or excuse is how I feel. I get back to work. So many times have I worked with “slut-shaming” female.

Did she not think about how parents might have had to pay the milk man? Or the butcher? Back when you would have been hungry and your parents loved you, yes. But they didn’t want you to go around slut-shaming people and kept their lives private. Whether lucrative in money or time; it was still something that was foreign to you because of their desire for dignity and privacy. Had this been exposed; you would realize you are no better than anyone else. Just your own person, essentially yourself. So again, why judge to that extent? There is no reason for it.

Living in truth, I am glad to move on and be away from people that give me creep vibes anyways when it comes to working with them and feeling completely comfortable. There’s a decent amount of fake. And here went the PTSD flashback to June 2024. I was working 80-100 hours a week at this nursing home. And there was a nurse that was giving another CNA meds to pass. I filed a state complaint. All I was thinking was how I was 6 weeks from graduating from the LPN Program and people were so willing to stifle my success by berating me about little things. Not realizing what I was going through in life.. And it was ridiculous. I come into work at the facility after doing 4-16 hour shifts in a row. The HR supervisor and Staffing Coordinator pull me in a room and tell me I wasn’t wearing scrubs and seemed to have an ‘attitude’ and I was being fired. I just sat there like we were on Oprah. And I am not jumping on the fucking couch. That is straight disrespect. Never wore anything but scrubs. Not inappropriate wearing tank tops everywhere and my ethics in the nursing field is still to question. And my Danskos were in a locker. I have been 321 pounds at my highest. Do you mind going to the woman wearing skin tight scrubs and discriminate against her? My scrubs are grey Grey’s Anatomy scrubs. And here you are with this moronic argument.

I’m the gold when I am telling the truth. I am the asset. It’s the liabilities that recognize the assets and still have jealousy and ignorance in their hearts. Which waters down their value. And I am glad to be valuable and shine amongst a decent amount of invaluable people and energies. I provided strength and beautify the aura with classical music even. I know I’ll be missed. I couldn’t guarantee the feeling of love and joy will be reciprocated. Which is sad.