I don’t do crew socks but I’ll blow the mind of the crew. -El’Aundra

I was sitting and thinking about getting the chips of paint off the stairs I was asked to clean. It’s work. And work is good. But what isn’t good is the energy I give myself. I talk to myself in such a way that is so awful and mean. Sometimes I want to be left alone. I don’t understand at times what people’s boundaries in life might be. In life we make an accident sometimes or we just have this idea that we were what most people would consider flawed. We spoke our honesty. You might not have meant to. You might not have known what the issues might have…

This was written on May 6, 2024. The perfect music to go along with this poem would be Alstad, Yana Chekina- The Seagull It was the absence of love in the first place. A lie that you told me there was no race. No race for your heart. No race for your soul. Walking around lost. Nobody that I deemed my whole. All I wanted was a family to fall in love with. A place for me to call home. I give win to the abstract. A lean to the depth. And so under that bush across from Upstate Farms, On the ground May 2023 I wept. I wept for…

Can I tell you how beautiful I already am? How beautiful I want to be? Can I also tell you what I’m running from. I’m running from a world that’s evil. That world was my past. I always felt beauty. I always relished in my way to captivate an audience. To take people by storm and win. That’s the goal. But the right way. The demonic tense always told me that the demon was at me from where i was coming from. It was someone close to me. So I started thinking that I’m losing this person. He would tell me that my mother is evil. And I was like…

I noticed at a young age, that I had the ability to feel more than I wanted to. I didn’t want to experience heartbreak as often as I did. But it was worth every minute. I felt inadequate at times because of other people; Projecting their insecurities onto me. Be careful who you spend your time with. Your insecurities shouldn’t be their burden. -El’Aundra

People ask ‘Aren’t you looking for love?’ No, I’m prepared for love. The difference is that if I was looking I would be insecure about my ability to get it. I am prepared for love because I know there’s a man that dreams of me just as much if not more than I dream of him.

It was inevitable. It was the epiphany. That could only be experienced with an open mind and heart. His heart. My heart. Oh this love… That to complete, two must come together. Must work together. Must be together, It should have… NO. It could have… NO. It will be… YES. Say yes… Let those 3 letters come out of your mouth. Yes to the idea. Yes to the love. My love. Your love. This love.

He was like a good book that I refused to put down. The undeniable attraction, looks of passion and the silence that could deafen the world. Given that this was our first encounter in person, I felt like we were onto something. Maybe it’s a mutual feeling and possibly to blame for my lack of reservation. We woke up wrapped in passion. I was the ribbon and he was the post. Naturally, I prepared breakfast with sentiment. Hungry for more, yet still hungry for food; the plate was empty in a matter of minutes. Usually what ensues after a well proportioned meal is sleep. And so he did.

Wait…wait for my love dear pretty. Once the wait is over, my love will be good and plenty. Plenty of good…Hard, long love for you. And a passion known as unbelievably true. Let me stroke you with the feather of desire. Let me build a ladder with which from the cloud 9 you’re on. You can only go higher. Scream once for the way my heart yearns for your emotion. Scream ten times if in this love making, you feel my devotion…oh this ocean…wait… Baby wait for my love.